As we contemplate what is the perfect gift to get anyone and everyone I feel like such a failure. I feel there are certain standards that must be upheld, but why? But what if they don't like the gift? What if they get rid of it? What should I have gotten them instead? Is it enough? Did I totally waste my time and effort?
I know I have gotten a few gifts over the years that have rapidly left the house or just never made it here. I'd rather get a gift card so I may get something I enjoy than to open up something and have to try and hide my confusion or dislike.
Wait a minute, it is a GIFT. Stop being such a rude unappreciative bitch. This person spent time, effort, and energy on YOU. Show some respect. Christmas is about giving NOT getting. (Hold that thought Christians)
How are we supposed to teach our children the true meaning? I can't even watch TV without every commercial being for a toy, jewelry, car (seriously people give cars? WTF? and can I be adopted into this family?), booze (that's a big HELL YEAH!), depression medication, and payday loans. Wow, what does this say about us?
What happened to the days where girls got a new doll
and boys got a BB gun
or baseball? Where your stocking
had an orange, stick candy, and a penny?
Now they are filled with iPods, video games, plastic toys that you never play with again. Have you listened to what some children list out as what they received? Might as well back up the truck from Toys R Us.
So keep this in mind before I go Christmas shopping for everyone I will do the following.
Take out a payday loan,
get hammered,
buy myself a new car and a diamond bracelet,
get the rest of you people
Then I will go to the doctor and ask for depression medication because I seriously must be ill to keep doing this year after year.
And remember its not that I don't love you- I just can't afford the both of us :)
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